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Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Grieving the Loss of a Living Loved One

Well today we sit at 15 weeks out...  Out of IBESR.  It has been 13 weeks and 2 days (93 days or 2,242 hours) since we last held our precious Heaven Sent Haitians.  We miss them and grieve for them.

13 weeks and 3 days ago
Do you see the space in the back of this picture?  The space between me and Steve?  Yep, Amanda and Josh belong there.  They would fit perfectly.  I have considered photo shopping them in but... One day we will retake this picture and we will be one whole family and it will be a perfect picture no photo shopping necessary.

We have been patient through this journey or so we believe and like to think we are being patient.  But honestly, our hearts ache and they ache nearly every moment of every day. Not just mine, Steve's, Josh's and Amanda's.  Conversations start with "when the kids get home..." or they end with "I hope the kids will like doing this too." "Will the kids be home in time to watch one of my games this year?" "I am afraid the kids won't be home for enough time before I go to college."  Every prayer ends with the pleading for God to bring our children home and sometimes with tears.  This is a real life journey for each of us and we pray this is not too much for our 5 children.  We know and trust "this" is all in His hands.

If we have been asked once, we have been asked 100 times, "when will your kids come home?"  Our general response is we are one day closer today.  It's true we are, every day we are one day closer to bringing our precious children home.  The next question usually asked is "whose fault is this wait, they should be home already right?" We blame no one.  We can't control governments and how they process paperwork.  America has it's issues as well as Haiti and every other government on this planet we call Earth.  Yes, in our opinion our kids should be home already but we are selfish and want what we want.  Do we want them home at the expense of incorrect paperwork?  NO!  Do we want them home at the expense of anything? NO! So they shouldn't be home yet because the paperwork isn't right yet.

There is a lot to juggle in life, struggles, over comings, blessings and just every day life.  We are doing all these things with the hope we will be blessed soon with "that" e-mail.  Until then we covet your prayers, encouragement and if you feel led to contribute please see the information to the right of this post for immediate donations and tax deductible donations.  We also sell items on our "support us" tab.  You may also shop 147 Million Orphan gear through us (view on their website contact us to purchase).  We are so blessed by those who have already given, those who continue to give and those who continue to pray diligently.  God has an awesome plan and we will continue to do our best to be patient waiting on His plan.

In Him,
Steve, Melanie, Amanda, Joshua, Monique, Junior and Frantz
One day soon we will be ONE family under ONE roof!

Isaiah 41:13
I am holding you by your hand - I, the Lord your God. And I say to you, "do not be afraid, I am here to help you."


shellandjim said...

Melanie I so know your pain and your heart tonight! I do not even attempt to understand this process anymore but NO ONE THING and I know you do too and that is the ONE who has always been in control still is! I pray for your heart, your Josh and Amanda's hearts, and your 3 waiting to get home to you and their hearts to still believe, to hold on, to have hope-courage-peace-and comfort tonight as the wait seems unbearable! Really, one day this will all just be a memory! I know tonight that seems impossible but I with you wait for that day when it IS but a memory and we are sitting sipping some ice cold tea at our reunion with all the other families and thinking BACK on the wait we went through! A shirt I found for Lovely online just came today and I wish I could order one for each of us and each child waiting!! It has printed on the front with a great big heart in the middle "I WAS WORTH THE WAIT!" OH MY GOODNESS IS THAT NOT THE TRUTH!!!!!
Much love,hope and prayers~Shell

Aleesa said...

Melanie, I know we have never actually met, unless you count facebook :) but I have met your sweet kids. I can't imagine what the waiting is like for you and my friends here that are adopting from Haiti. Just know that there are many praying for you and your family. Take comfort in the Lord and find peace in His arms.

Amy said...

I photo shopped, well hubby did, J into a family pic and printed it on a shirt for J a long time before he came home. It took us 4 years to get him home. I don't know how long you've been in process but I understand the insane waiting.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for stopping by my blog and introducing yourself. It is wonderful to read your blog, and to see your beautiful children. Their rooms look wonderful and I know they are ready to start their life here in America, with love, dancing, football and much more. I am so relieved to see someone who can honestly say that they do not want the process to go faster at the expense of the paperwork being done accurately and ethically. I know that should be a given,...the way everyone should feel...but so many times it is not for some people. You are right and you are doing an amazing job of waiting and dreaming and aching and loving your children.